we took a turn to make sure he wasnt doing anything rash and perhaps he was just a repair man. but he wasnt.
he was just staring down into the highway below him.
people called the police i think, and they came, talked to him, persuaded him to get back down and he did.
i felt weird?scared. that you never know what have just happened on that street u just walked down 5 mins ago. because after he was brought away, the road seemed odinary. life for everyone carries on as usual.
But it isnt. it was a place where someone had serious thoughts abt ending his own life.
perhaps he got fired, or broke up with a girlfriend, or have no place to stay.
but i felt sad because maybe he didnt know that he had a God.
and many people here i believe, dont know it.
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Antonia(a chinese girl my age in uk) saw my blog, and said
' its good to have something to believe in'
despite seeing lots of churches here in manchester, she said most of them are turned into community centres and very little people go to church on sundays.
i asked if any of her friends are christian, she said ' some are, but some dont believe there is a God after all, maybe its just something someone came up with.'
hearing that, sadness and desperation came. desperate for the people here to see that there is a God that exists, that loved them, that cares for them, that loves them despite their grades, looks,behaviours,how rebellious,lost they are.
Pastor said before that long ago, european countries were filled with God, sending missionaries to asia to spread the gospel when asia does not know abt God.
now, the european countries are dry, and asia as we grow stronger, have to go back to europe to show them the light once again.
in that room with antonia, i finally believed taht was true.
what are we going to do to help them?
this trip brought back lots of questions that i was asking myself.
we always hear about going to the ends of the earth for God, or being brought there to do these works.
it hit me that, hey, i didnt actaully had a decision in coming to man. it wasnt that i wanted to go there voluntarily. i just accepted it. the circumstances came together, and it fit into this picture. thinking now, i was literally placed on the other side of the world, away from my family and friends, away from familarity. into a totally unknown place, by God himself.
So now, the thing is, what does He want me to do there? im excited but at the same time scared or dont want to because maybe im selfish? i think of my own discomfort living in this place.
one step closer to manchester, is one step further from singapore.
all in all, i place my emotions and heart to Him.
i dont want to follow my heart, but follow Him.
it takes lots of trust, and am learning now.
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I got into St. Bedes college!:)) passed the interview and all, school looks old, but somewhat cosy. the steps creak, looks abit like harry potter.
thankful to God for choosing this school.
went to liverpool yesterday to visit my dad's friend. :) really fun, post pictures soon.
housing is still a big question mark.
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Excited to go back to sing!coming back on wednesday:))))
sometimes i dont know if its good to share so openly here abt my true feelings, makes me feel, hmmm.. vulnurable.
